Stuffed Acorn Squash

This here dish is a great meal all alone. It takes about fifteen minutes to prepare and another hour to bake. Fire yer oven up and warm it to about three Mississippi (400-425 deg F) whilst ye’re preparing the stuffed squash.

Ta’ feed two nermal people ye’re gonna’ need the followin’ ingredients. Fer real fat folks ya’ might wanna’ double the ingredients. However, in Grandpa’s experience, fat folks don’t like squash very much b’cuz the cholesterol and fat content is too low to keep drivin’ toward their inevitable heart disease.

1 acorn squash

1 apple (any variety)

1 whole lime

1 slice of sweet onion

3 tbsp grated parmesan

1 tsp ground cinnamon

2-3 ounces of Grandpa Wilbur’s Three Meat Maple Sausage

*** Tip ***

If yer grated parmesan is in a can with a shaker top on it then ya’ should tape a nickel to the can and throw it into the trash. That-a-way, if the trash man finds it, he’ll think that he got a tip and he’ll be five cents better off than you are. Next, go the supermarket and buy a wedge of real parmesan and a grater, if ya’ don’t have one already.

Cut yer squash in half from stem to tip. Spoon the seeds and strings out and thow ‘em away with the canned parmesan imitation. Y’a don’ need ta’ tape no nickels to the seeds though.

Sprinkle ground cinnamon lightly inside of each half of squash and set ‘em aside.

Core, peel and cut up the apple into about ¼ inch pieces and put ‘em into a mixin’ bowl.

Cut yer lime in half and juice it into the bowl with the apple. Stir to saturate apple pieces with lime juice.

Chop up the sweet onion slice and add to the apple-lime juice mixture.

Grate about three tablespoons off of yer parmesan wedge and add that to the apple, onion and lime juice.

Mix all of ingredients thoroughly and pack it into the squash halves up to about a ¼ inch from the edge.

Smoosh yer three meat maple sausage into two patties thet will fit into the squash on top of the stuffing.

Set stuffed halves into a non-stick baking pan or spray the pan with non-stick coating. Cover with foil to keep the sausage from burning.

By now yer oven should be at three Mississippi. Put the pan in an’ be sure to close the door so thet it will bake faster.

Set yer timer ta’ 50 minutes.

Ya’ can tell if a squash is cooked about the same way thet ya’ know if a baked tater is cooked. A toothpick will press easily into the flesh. Also, the squash will be difficult to pick up with tongs b’cuz it will be soft to the grip of the tongs.

Fer added touch ya’ can cover the top of the squash with grated or sliced cheese of yer choice. This is according to taste. Grandpa Wilbur and the Missus like ‘em jes’ fine without added cheese.

Bake fer ‘nuther ten minutes without the foil cover to melt added cheese. Bake longer if needed to finish cooking the squash.

Ya’ can slice yer squash into lengths fer eatin’ er ya’ can jes’ put the half into a bowl and spoon out the squash flesh, stuffin’ and sausage.

Some of Grandpa Wilbur’s recipes are variations of ideas put together from other recipes. This here stuffed squash is a Grandpa Wilbur Original right from scratch.

Homemade Three Meat Maple Syrup Sausage

This here sausage only takes up about an hour to make enough to last you quite a while. The best part is that it ain't got none of them chemicals in it with fourteen syllable names. As a general rule, Grandpa Wilbur thinks that if you cain't pronounce it, then you shouldn't ought to be eating it.

Anyway, if you think that a five pound batch of sausage is too much for you then you can just invite some friends or family over to help you make up a batch. If you’re real hard up, then you could even invite the in-laws over. If you do that, though, you’re gonna’ wanna’ double the batch to avoid a fight over who takes the most home.

Grandpa Wilbur can tell you straight up that once you sample this here sausage it’s gonna’ be like trying to eat just one Lay’s Potato Chip.  

You’re gonna’ need the following ingredients for a single batch of sausage.

1 lb ground beef

1 lb ground pork

3 lbs ground chicken or turkey

1 cup finely chopped sweet onion

4 tsp sage

4 tsp poultry seasoning

4 tsp black pepper

2 tsp cayenne

2 tsp salt

6 tbsp maple syrup

You wanna’ put all of this stuff into a bowl big enough to hold it all and leave you some smooshing and mixing room without it spilling out of the sides.

Wash your hands thoroughly with soap and water before starting to smoosh and mix. You don’t want any Typhoid Mary stuff going on.

Before you start mixing your sausage, coat the inside of a cast iron skillet with cooking spray and set it over a burner with the knob twisted to about 1/3. You’re gonna’ need this for cooking up a sample when you’re done mixing.

Commence smooshing and mixing your sausage. When you think that you’re done, just keep on smooshing and mixing until you cain’t turn up no more colors, in the mix, different from the rest of the sausage.

When you’re satisfied that the sausage is mixed, cook a small patty in the hot pan and do a taste test. You can add more spices if you like or some more meat to tame it down if it’s too hot for you.

This is where, if you invited help over to make your sausage, you’re gonna’ wish that you didn't. That’s because once that sausage lights up your tasters, you won’t want to share. Worse, when your helpers get a sample, they’re gonna’ try to sneak away with all of your sausage.

Set aside the sausage that you’ll use in the next day or two and press the rest into patties and freeze them. It doesn't matter what diameter that you like to make them but they cook up best if they’re about ¾” of an inch thick. At that thickness, you can put these patties, still frozen, into a covered skillet with a little chicken broth or water, on medium heat. They’ll cook up delicious in no time.